O Christmas Tree

2 conversations

Kelli: “Maia, there’s a bus. Did you know you’re going to go to school one day on a bus like that?”
Maia: “Backpack?”
Kelli “Yeah, and you can have a backpack. What do you think you’ll put in the backpack Maia?”
Maia: “Snacks, Books, Movies…”

Maia (as she pulls up her shirt): “See belly button?”
Kelli: “Yeah, belly button! Maia, do you think the new baby will have a belly button?”
Maia: “mmmmm….. probably.”

the daddy and maia show

...just one of the ways maia and i found to preoccupy ourselves while mommy was sick.

bono receives naacp award

Church retreat and stadium visit (remix)

enjoy this new look at an old favorite!

Church Retreat weekend video

make your own video @ animoto.com

Church retreat and stadium visit

This weekend we went on a church retreat in St. James, MO-about 2 hours southwest of St. Louis. On our way home we went immediately to Cardinals Stadium for St. John's Mercy Medical (where Kelli works) Employee appreciation day. They had rented out the park for the evening. Unlimited soda, hot-dogs, bratwursts and ice-cream. The game, in Arizona, was playing on the big screen. The best part was a tour of the field and the Cardinals dug-out!

these days III

These days Maia tip toes around the house when something tickles her with delight.

Sings carelessly--with no words and no real note structure--just because she likes too.

Sings the whole first verse of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star without any help.

Talks a lot about Jesus when listening to worship cd's @ lunch-time (just yesterday she said, out of nowhere, "Jesus...happy". To which mommy replied, "Does Jesus make you happy Maia?" To which she replied, "Yes... and mercy.").

Says "yessir" a lot, ramming the two words together as if she's a product of the south...

Images of Summer

Our summer has pretty much officially drawn to a close as Matt starts classes tomorrow. I hope you enjoy some of these favorite images from our summer. . .it has been a great one!

jewels

sometimes when we peak in on her sleeping, maia will open her eyes and look up at us dreamily, blinking slowly. and in that pale lighting her blue eyes look to me like jewels.

Jesus

Kelli and Maia were listening to an Indelible Grace worship CD while they were eating lunch today. At one point a song mentioned Jesus. Hearing it in the background, Maia repeated, “Jesus”, then she paused and completed her thought, "...happy."
Kelli responded, “Does Jesus make you happy Maia?” To which she replied, “Yes”.

she brings life

she brings life when she stoops down on her haunches, gently picks up the small flower pot and examines the seedlings, naming them "mommy, daddy, baby".

she brings laughter when at the question of her father, "Who's your daddy?" instead of pointing at me replies, "Mr. Matt" in innocent sincerity.

old man with round glasses

I went to Target and Trader Joe's with my family today. As Kelli and I climbed in our Jeep and readied to leave, I noticed an older man in a suit pushing his Trader Joe's cart towards us. He was a friendly looking man with round glasses and a top hat, his cheery face wrapped in an invitation to conversation. His face seemed frozen in a comfortable smile, an unmistakable bounce an integral part of his walk. Instinctively, I raised my hand to wave. Kelli almost immediately did the same.

As we pulled away, I paused."I just completely waved at that man like I knew him..."

"Oh my gosh, I did too!" Kelli responded with her trademark delight in the little things of life...

"Perhaps," I offered, "we just had an encounter with a shaven, haircut, summer Santa..."

from here to...

She stared as she walked slowly forward. Grasping her sippy cup with one hand and scratching her head with her right, she looked distracted. I turned to see what had grabbed her attention above us. The action of her right hand served as a metaphor for her serious contemplation. She was, it seemed to me, trying to figure out what was making all that beauty. As the tree waved its limbs and leaves in the wind, the sun barely poked its rays through, shining, shimmering and shouting out suggestions of eternity.

these days II

these days, as we drive past a playground, she laughs and giggles with delight.

the church and the poor with tony campolo

In the playroom

Thunderclap!
“More?” she said…
But I’m not God.

Sweetest scent.
“More?” I said…
But I’m not God.

Childhood books,
“More?” she said…
And so I read.

Material memories,
“More?” I cried.
Fate is suffused.

3 things to say

I
As I bent down to wash off Maia’s messy dinner hands and dinner face, she wrapped her arms around me and spoke beautiful words. She spoke them softly and confidently—although not as if they weren’t a sudden epiphany, “wuv wu”. And I nearly lost it… finishing the clean up through fog filled eyes.

II
…and they all waited for her up on the sidewalk. Kelli unloaded her from the car and sent her up the steps. Then the frenzy began. Her four friends were simply delighted to see her. They all jumped and squealed, running circles around each other. I think child-like faith must look something like that.

III
As I bowed my head to pray with Maia before dinner last night, I heard a strange sound. Suddenly she was speaking a series of “umms” and “um-hums” as I offered thanks for our meal. Wanting to take part in things, Maia has—apparently—learned what it means to “agree in prayer”.

these days

These days she looks at us with searching intensity while we explain to her the nuances of life (the way of discipline or the reason playtime has to wait). And she expresses her delight at the little things with shotgun delivery. “CAR!” “PuzzlePuzzle?” and randomly, while sitting at the dinner table, she’ll point appropriately and exclaim, “MOMmys… DADdys...,” the plural apparently added on just for good measure.

Luther's sanctification

“This life is not righteousness, but growth in righteousness; not health, but healing; not being, but becoming, not rest, but exercise. We are not yet what we shall be, but we are growing toward it; the process is not yet finished, but it is going on; this is not the end, but it is the goal; all does not yet gleam with glory, but all is being purified.”
Luther (from: John Theodore Mueller, Christian Dogmatics (1934), p. 389):

self-aware

as her humour develops it becomes increasingly obvious that self-awareness and humour are intimately tied. so it sheds new light (hope) on the shards of teenage angst that are left over in our hearts. self-awareness brings laughter, not just despair.

2007 PCA Mercy Ministry Conference

2007 PCA Mercy Ministry Conference

If you or someone you know wants to attend the 2007 PCA Mercy Ministry Conference but are not able to because you did not sign up early enough, please contact me by leaving a comment on this post. i am registered, but am now not able to attend. however, they are not able to refund my registration and i need to find someone to transfer my registration to!

again, if you would like to attend the 2007 PCA Mercy Ministry Conference, please leave a comment on this post! i would be happy to get in touch with you and help you transfer my registration accordingly.

2007 PCA Mercy Ministry Conference

we're home!

Maia’s supposed to be napping. Instead, she fingers at the bandage on her right hand. Unfettered now, she hovers—just barely—above her crib mattress… too curious to sleep. Rag doll limptitude now suffused by the clear liquid hospital “blood” of medicine. A chuckle escapes from behind the paleness, and her crusted mouth breaks into a grin. Our little girl is back.

Ornery, perky peaks from under a sea of bluewhitegreenyellow blankets… she stalls her nap. “Mommy! Daddy!” she blurts out persuasively. Persuasive, for what she really communicates is, “I’m so cute! Let’s play!” “Mommy will be right back”, I reply…just as convincingly. “Lay down, its time to sleep.” Almost as abruptly as she picked herself up from the crib, she throws herself down. Her sleep needs now wrapped up in one bold mixture of disorder, deprivation and rejuvenation, restful slumber refuses to overstay its welcome (though she is one visitor we would like to do so).

She fingers her bandage again.

Soon she’ll point at that hand to proudly proclaim, “Boo-boo.” And it won’t be long till she’s fingering at her favorite bible again—looking for Jesus’ “boo-boos”. Then, finding them she’ll proudly point and proclaim, “boo-boos!” And, upon further prodding, she’ll kiss Jesus’ boo-boos and say, “dhank-do” (which—translated—means, “Thank you”).

u2 and what love has done:

Crossroads Documentary

for those interested, the crossroads video was made with a basic miniDV camcorder and edited on imovie.

my town

thanks to "mr. anonymous" for the recommendation on the youtube documentary on doug wilson and Christ church. "my town" is the grass roots film that examines the neo-confederate (or paleo-confederate, as wilson would insist) underpinnings of wilson's church, college and publications. i was ignorant to such myself, but the hour long piece proved enlightening. maybe i should do some more reading (in my "free time") before i make any brash assertions, but based on wilson's proclamations alone it seems that he is in grave danger of misrepresenting the gospel to many people in moscow, ID and, furthermore, to the rest of the country.

here's my quick eval., as i see it:
wilson, christ church, etc., in an attempt to "usher in" the new millenium have become myopically focused on issues of state rights and the original intentions of the old covenant to be ruled by a theocracy. Though the new covenant marks the transition of the gospel from its manifestation as a "church-state" nexus to one established in the heavenly realms; it seems that wilson is concerned with ushering in a theocracy in america. furthermore, in an attempt to evaluate the discussions of servitude in the bible, he has said some destructive things about how supposedly "harmonius" slavery in america truly was. instead of becoming winsome to the culture for the sake of the gospel (re: Paul's sermon at the Areopagus in Acts 17) it seems he has wedged an unnecessary, harmful and unbiblical stumbling block into the hearts and minds of many non-believers.

Haiti Missions Trip Video

childhood

its at moments like these that i wish i could pull up my childhood, like a file on a computer, and look at the feelings that wonder held.

it was even then that the administrative offices of a mall complex struck me as inhuman, torturous and... boring.

she sees broken things well

It was an innocent thing, I don't think she knew what she was saying.

But when Amma Bell, the nine year old neighbor, said it, she meant it.

Maia spotted the chalk, the two pieces broken, and pointed them out for us all too see!

"Maia is very good at seeing broken things," Amma Bell said, yes she said with pointedness.

And so did the 4 year old brother, "maia sees broken things..."

What they didn't know is that I already knew that, because she often spots another child's hurt and gives them love.

"I wonder what she'll become," said mommy in response to this story i told.

...who knows. Perhaps, a nurse, a doctor, a counselor... a mom. Or perhaps none of these at all.

But what remains true, regardless, is that she loves others well, and beyond this even, "she sees broken things well."

i think this is why they say its hard to watch them grow up...

Many wizened and experienced parents will probably be able to more aptly explain to you a phenomenon I recently experienced. It’s Sunday night and our family is at church, waiting to take part in a community meal. Everyone mills about talking with one another. The kids’ play with one another and the fellowship hall becomes an almost endless stretch of active running space. It’s not a very large room, but to them it is more than sufficient. The stage up front—more like a very high platform—is packed out with several small tables and chairs. In the times before meals and after morning services, this dais acts as a stand-in for tree-fort, high-rise building and sweltering Amazon jungle…all at the same time. Maia has well passed the point where we are able to let her run through the hall and climb up on the stage—her favorite spot to play. As I stand on the main floor chatting, waiting for our pastor to say grace, I look over toward the small platform to see what Maia is doing. She stands next to a table—the chair pulled out behind her—the only child on the florescent light saturated stage. Then she looks shyly, but longingly, at the older kids at play on the floor below. And suddenly she places her palms on the edge of the table, fingers curled under the top, and bends at the waist, flopping onto the table belly first. She smiles hopefully, her eyes trained once more on the other children. She hungers to understand them, to jump with the strength of a spry six year old. And before I can understand what is happening, I am nearly knocked off my feet by a strange mix of emotions. Joy, sadness, sympathy and love twist together in a split second of time, frustrating my comprehension. But my recollection of that night brings back the same sensation with an awkward, un-aged force. And I realize that it is joy at her delight, sadness at the sudden onslaught of independence, sympathy for the relational hindrances and, finally, love for her that causes the disarray in my heart. Little Maia is growing up. And—as with every child—it is happening muchmuchmuch too fast. She grows without any directive from her parents. She grows without regard for the dangers of growing up. She grows with the veracity of a thirsty animal, seeking out a mountain brook. She grows with the hope of God’s children and the selfishness of Adam’s race. But most importantly she grows, in spite of herself, as a child of Grace.

the shorter catechism

Matt: Maia, who’s in the mirror?
Maia: Me!
(a few moments later…)
Matt: Maia, “what is the chief end of man?... God.” [which I thought would be a good starter for the fuller answer, “to glorify God”]
Matt (again): Okay, you try it maia, “what is the chief end of man?”
Maia: Me!

Gums wrapped up in red lily lips (nursing home)

"As you enter this life
I pray you depart
With a wrinkled face
And a brand new heart"
-U2 from Love and peace or Else

Gums wrapped up in red lily lips
Tongues, exposed, tumbling about

Wistful dialogical intercourse,
Leaned on walkers

Death, waiting;
Death, waited for

Abandonment, desolation
Visitation, hope

The inhabitants reminded of youth
The visitors enlightened to vincibility

Silent sermons; shouted
Hospitality scorned

Dementia, embraced
Life, envied; life-sucking

Life embraced, joy sustained
Tenderness…grace