almost certainly our church home for st. louis:
http://www.crossroadspres.com
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Saturday, November 26, 2005
Sunday, November 20, 2005
Jesus
...and then it hit me. Christ's wounds, that is. they're scars. they're not just holes. you might be able to look through the opening in his hands and see to the other side. but then again, you may not. but what counts is that they're there.
if they're real scars then they look leathery and healed. they aren't still bleeding. they're like the scars that we all share, distortions and mutations of skin that come about from the healing of a wound. and so it must be for him. because he's real. and so are his scars. and one day, by God's grace, i'll see them. one day, he'll reach out his hands and show them to me. but even then i may not be able to see them. my eyes will be blurry and my face will be drenched with tears. i will bow. i will embrace. and i will worship. i will realize complete forgiveness in the completeness of my brokeness.
he's real, you know. though my imagined perceptions of him are way off kilter... he's still real. and for one small moment it hit me. in spite of my self-abosorption, self focus and self loathing... he's still real. he has a face. a personality. he has a body. because he's a man like me. but he's so much more. thank goodness, he's so much more. thank goodness his scars are real. thank God he's God.
so capture my heart, oh wounded one. for i am daily wounded and daily wounding. i am covered with scars. daily i provide the injuries for new scars and daily i receive the wounds that will lead to new scars. so heal my wounds and give meaning to my scars... for the purpose of glorifying yours.
if they're real scars then they look leathery and healed. they aren't still bleeding. they're like the scars that we all share, distortions and mutations of skin that come about from the healing of a wound. and so it must be for him. because he's real. and so are his scars. and one day, by God's grace, i'll see them. one day, he'll reach out his hands and show them to me. but even then i may not be able to see them. my eyes will be blurry and my face will be drenched with tears. i will bow. i will embrace. and i will worship. i will realize complete forgiveness in the completeness of my brokeness.
he's real, you know. though my imagined perceptions of him are way off kilter... he's still real. and for one small moment it hit me. in spite of my self-abosorption, self focus and self loathing... he's still real. he has a face. a personality. he has a body. because he's a man like me. but he's so much more. thank goodness, he's so much more. thank goodness his scars are real. thank God he's God.
so capture my heart, oh wounded one. for i am daily wounded and daily wounding. i am covered with scars. daily i provide the injuries for new scars and daily i receive the wounds that will lead to new scars. so heal my wounds and give meaning to my scars... for the purpose of glorifying yours.
Friday, November 11, 2005
still here
i just realized its been over a month since i posted my last blog. its hard not to post something that i've spent a little bit of time composing. but here goes a quick, 2 min. update. all's well for us in st. louie. classes are keeping very busy. i've got my 3rd greek test next week. looking forward to t-day break and spending time with kelli's parents (will be the first time they've seen maia since august).
maia keeps growing and is continually stretching her clothes to the max. she is smilier than ever. her joy is a contagious hearlifter for both of us. she continues to live up to her name ("healer"). her new thing is reaching out for her uplifted feet when she is lying down. she loves to grab her toes. both her legs, in fact, seem to take on a life of their own when she is lying down. she raises them up and drops them back down again several consecutive times while she lies in her crib, fighting sleep. and she wakes up that way. active. making girly noises and soft yelps. waiting to play. waiting for someone to smile at. her smiles are like an automatic reflex when she wakens. no sooner than she sees us, she's grinning. she seems to be no more in control of her smiles than her random leg lift/drops. its just a part of who she is. kelli and i are both extremely blessed by her daily presence.
kelli is well. she started work at a local church nursery last week. she works there every thurs. so far, there haven't been too many kids, but she enjoys it when there are. we continue to get to know people and to develop relationships with our neighbors. working through new relationships is strange, exciting, imbalanced, weird, and wonderful all at the same time. please pray for us in the deepening of these relationships. please also pray for us as we seek out a more permanent church home (and a good place for an internship).
i am well. last sunday i took an extra large piece of bread for communion. not just to stave off the early afternoon hunger pangs. i stand, more than ever, in need of grace. God's mercy to me in the sacraments and through the means of grace is a daily source of sustanence. he is blessing us here. but its still life. there is still the susceptibility to the routine and the mundane. there is no place i'd rather been right now. here. with my family. studying God's word. thank you for your prayers on our behalf. please continue to hold us up before the throne of grace.
maia keeps growing and is continually stretching her clothes to the max. she is smilier than ever. her joy is a contagious hearlifter for both of us. she continues to live up to her name ("healer"). her new thing is reaching out for her uplifted feet when she is lying down. she loves to grab her toes. both her legs, in fact, seem to take on a life of their own when she is lying down. she raises them up and drops them back down again several consecutive times while she lies in her crib, fighting sleep. and she wakes up that way. active. making girly noises and soft yelps. waiting to play. waiting for someone to smile at. her smiles are like an automatic reflex when she wakens. no sooner than she sees us, she's grinning. she seems to be no more in control of her smiles than her random leg lift/drops. its just a part of who she is. kelli and i are both extremely blessed by her daily presence.
kelli is well. she started work at a local church nursery last week. she works there every thurs. so far, there haven't been too many kids, but she enjoys it when there are. we continue to get to know people and to develop relationships with our neighbors. working through new relationships is strange, exciting, imbalanced, weird, and wonderful all at the same time. please pray for us in the deepening of these relationships. please also pray for us as we seek out a more permanent church home (and a good place for an internship).
i am well. last sunday i took an extra large piece of bread for communion. not just to stave off the early afternoon hunger pangs. i stand, more than ever, in need of grace. God's mercy to me in the sacraments and through the means of grace is a daily source of sustanence. he is blessing us here. but its still life. there is still the susceptibility to the routine and the mundane. there is no place i'd rather been right now. here. with my family. studying God's word. thank you for your prayers on our behalf. please continue to hold us up before the throne of grace.
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